Tweaker With AK-47 Tells Cops Trump Told Him To Fight Lizard People
Things didn’t go well in the war against the lizard people recently, at least in the mind of a Washington State man who “snorted methamphetamine to lose weight”.
NBC reports that local citizens were alarmed when the 54 year old man stopped his white Jeep Cherokee in the middle of the intersection on November 25th, and begun “waving around an AK-47” as well as a loaded Ruger .357 revolver around while screaming that President Trump had ordered him to fight “the lizard people”.
Fortunately for everyone, the man put the guns back in the car as troopers approached him—some armed with rifles of their own.
“The man immediately laid on the ground and started to scream about ‘sending in the news’ and about ‘the lizard people,’” the Pierce County Sheriff’s Department said in a statement. “As our patrol deputy and a trooper attempted to place him in handcuffs, he suddenly pulled away his arms and tried to resist being handcuffed while continuing to scream.”
The troopers responding on the scene brought his crusade to an end with a stiff shock from a taser.
A spokeperson for the Highway Patrol said the man is currently undergoing mental evaluation in a local facility. His identity has not yet been released by officials.
According to the sheriff’s department, the man told the arresting officers he had snorted methamphetamine to lose weight and was taking prescribed morphine, but added “the meth doesn’t make me crazy man, the lizard people are real!”
“The man went on to describe how President Trump had called his house in Eatonville and warned him that the lizard people were coming and that the alpha dragon had already taken his family hostage,” the sheriff’s department said. “He said he had stopped in the intersection because he was surrounded by the lizard people and need to fight them as directed by the President. He said he was screaming and making a scene in the intersection in order to ‘attract the news vans’ and so ‘his story could be documented for history.’”
Medics at the scene determined the man was “heavily under the influence of a stimulant” and he was placed in a 14-day mental health evaluation hold.
Inside the car was found a loaded Century Arms AK-47, the revolver, five loaded magazines for the rifle, a holster for the revolver and a wooden bat, the sheriff’s department said. There were 170 rounds of 7.62 mm ammunition loaded in the magazines for the AK-47. The cache of weapons was booked into evidence, the sheriff’s office said.
Police released images of the small cache of weapons inside the car on the passenger’s side of the vehicle. A long black rifle can be seen propped against the passenger seat, next to a camouflage backpack, rifle magazines and a silver revolver.
Mr Americana, Overpasses News Desk
December 6th, 2017
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